BEDM14 What’s your [insert beverage of choice] ritual?
There will probably be quite a lot of people writing today about how they make their tea, but it’s an obvious choice because it’s one of the few drinks that has a ritual. And although I say to people that I’m not fussy about my tea and I’ll take it as it comes, the truth is that I don’t like the way most people make it because they make it wrong.
So here is the correct way to make a cup of tea:
Boil the kettle.
Put a teabag in a mug. ON NO ACCOUNT PUT MILK ON THE TEABAG. MILKY TEABAGS ARE DISGUSTING YOU INHUMAN MONSTER.
Pour freshly boiled water on the teabag. If you leave it in the kettle for a while before putting it in the cup, boil it again just before you pour it.
IMMEDIATELY stir the teabag for a few seconds and squeeze it out against the side. Just something like three seconds of stirring, you don’t need to go nuts. I don’t like the teabag to sit motionless in the water for very long because you end up with funny filmy bits floating around on top of the tea.
Remove the teabag and dispose of it. If you use it to make a second cup, I will know because the colour won’t be right, so this is only appropriate if the second cup is for someone other than me.
Pour in a SPLASH of milk. Not loads. I do not like my tea really milky, it gives it an unpleasant texture. If in doubt, err on the side of too little milk rather than too much. More can be added (although I would hardly ever need to), but you can’t take milk out once you’ve put it in.
Stir and serve.
There. You are now fully equipped to make me a perfect cup of tea. If you make your tea any other way to this, you’re very, very wrong and I pity you.